Post by Rook on Mar 29, 2012 11:13:43 GMT -5
The Beginning
- Subway entrance. Man gets on a subway and is chased out of the train by the party of adventurers. They stop in a Charlie’s Angles shot. “Where are we?” “I dunno, but we’re gonna loot it.
- Raid the subway, scaring old ladies, rummaging through purses, discover a vending machine. Thief starts to search for traps, fighter busts it in.
- Party sits around eating the contents of the vending machine. A cop shows up “Drop the Doritos, hands in the air!”
- Cops begin to cuff them, but they offer to pay for damages, pulling out a gold coin. The cop lets them go. They make camp in the park.
- At the encampment they are roasting a cat or dog or something over the fire. Fighter chases off a bum. Police show up and arrest them.
- Adventurers sit on the bench, handcuffed. Thief slips out of cuffs, gets a cup of coffee, slips back into his cuffs and sips. “This stuff is great!” They are told that they wont go to jail (YAY) they will be rehabilitated (awww)
- Meet with social worker. “You are the first recipients of our newly implemented ‘Likely nonviolent deranged persons’ rehabilitation program. They protest that they are not deranged. He asks them a series of questions. They give crazy answers. “We’ll start tomorrow.”
- “You’ve been put up in an apartment until the program is over. The fridge is lightly stocked. I’ll see you this evening.” When he returns, they are roasting a package of hotdogs over a fire in the living room.
- They go shopping for groceries. Each has their own cart. The thief buys nothing but coffee. The wizard’s cart fills with food by magic. Fighter fills his with meat and the elf with flowers and shampoo. Try to pay with silver coins. Thief flees the store with his cart on principle.
- Bus ride home, social worker argues the existence of goblins. Goblin attack happens behind his back. On the bus.
- Social worker takes them out for fast food. Thief is addicted to French fries. Thief sneaks to steal more fries. Wizard can’t get over ice cubes. etc.
The Office
- The interview. The wizard spouts nonsense, the fighter talks about fighting, the thief steals stuff and the cleric cures his baldness. Someone comments “Strangest adventure yet” Thief chimes in “We better level up.”
- Adventurers are paired up with mentors. Fighter w/ feminist (you don’t scare me) thief w/ rules nazi, elf with pervert and wizard with gossip.
- Mentor conflict: Fighter offends feminist with chivalry
- Mentor conflict: Thief’s apathetic mail handling (opening and reading mail.) He gives a lame excuse and his mentor shouts: “Why should I believe you?” “Because my ranks in diplomacy add synergy to my bluff.” “Oh, okay.”
- Mentor conflict: Gossip tries everything in her repertoire to engage him in sensible conversation.
- Mentor conflict: Elf tries to actually work, but her mentor must do everything for her…and stare at her boobs.
- Thief receives jello as a welcome to the office gift. Wary of it he pokes and stabs it, throwing it across the room. “My trapsense was tingling.”
- Dress code: The boss calls them all in and reminds them of the dress code. (up to this point they have been wearing traditional DnD Esque garb or armor.) Cut scenes of their wardrobe mishaps such as guys drooling when elf bends over, wizards hat pointing over cubical, fighter’s armor noisy. Next day they show up in a hilarious hybrid of office attire and DnD clothes.
- The wizard turns a conference room of clients into frogs. The boss has to try and convince him to turn them back.
- The Fighter tries many ways to sneak his sword into the office.
- The Thief keeps on stealing things and his cubicle soon becomes an overflowing hoard.
- Boss praises the elf for her productivity, when in reality she's given up and just passes off all her work to the slavering male employees.
- Wizard gives a power point presentation, no one is sure what it means, contains glyphs and arcane script. “What does this have to do with sales?”
- Thief is late for work, video games.
- Fighter seems to attract random encounters, but usually when no one is looking. A conversation with a coworker is ended with said coworker stomping off shouting “No such things as goblins!” They come in through the window a second later.
- Subway entrance. Man gets on a subway and is chased out of the train by the party of adventurers. They stop in a Charlie’s Angles shot. “Where are we?” “I dunno, but we’re gonna loot it.
- Raid the subway, scaring old ladies, rummaging through purses, discover a vending machine. Thief starts to search for traps, fighter busts it in.
- Party sits around eating the contents of the vending machine. A cop shows up “Drop the Doritos, hands in the air!”
- Cops begin to cuff them, but they offer to pay for damages, pulling out a gold coin. The cop lets them go. They make camp in the park.
- At the encampment they are roasting a cat or dog or something over the fire. Fighter chases off a bum. Police show up and arrest them.
- Adventurers sit on the bench, handcuffed. Thief slips out of cuffs, gets a cup of coffee, slips back into his cuffs and sips. “This stuff is great!” They are told that they wont go to jail (YAY) they will be rehabilitated (awww)
- Meet with social worker. “You are the first recipients of our newly implemented ‘Likely nonviolent deranged persons’ rehabilitation program. They protest that they are not deranged. He asks them a series of questions. They give crazy answers. “We’ll start tomorrow.”
- “You’ve been put up in an apartment until the program is over. The fridge is lightly stocked. I’ll see you this evening.” When he returns, they are roasting a package of hotdogs over a fire in the living room.
- They go shopping for groceries. Each has their own cart. The thief buys nothing but coffee. The wizard’s cart fills with food by magic. Fighter fills his with meat and the elf with flowers and shampoo. Try to pay with silver coins. Thief flees the store with his cart on principle.
- Bus ride home, social worker argues the existence of goblins. Goblin attack happens behind his back. On the bus.
- Social worker takes them out for fast food. Thief is addicted to French fries. Thief sneaks to steal more fries. Wizard can’t get over ice cubes. etc.
The Office
- The interview. The wizard spouts nonsense, the fighter talks about fighting, the thief steals stuff and the cleric cures his baldness. Someone comments “Strangest adventure yet” Thief chimes in “We better level up.”
- Adventurers are paired up with mentors. Fighter w/ feminist (you don’t scare me) thief w/ rules nazi, elf with pervert and wizard with gossip.
- Mentor conflict: Fighter offends feminist with chivalry
- Mentor conflict: Thief’s apathetic mail handling (opening and reading mail.) He gives a lame excuse and his mentor shouts: “Why should I believe you?” “Because my ranks in diplomacy add synergy to my bluff.” “Oh, okay.”
- Mentor conflict: Gossip tries everything in her repertoire to engage him in sensible conversation.
- Mentor conflict: Elf tries to actually work, but her mentor must do everything for her…and stare at her boobs.
- Thief receives jello as a welcome to the office gift. Wary of it he pokes and stabs it, throwing it across the room. “My trapsense was tingling.”
- Dress code: The boss calls them all in and reminds them of the dress code. (up to this point they have been wearing traditional DnD Esque garb or armor.) Cut scenes of their wardrobe mishaps such as guys drooling when elf bends over, wizards hat pointing over cubical, fighter’s armor noisy. Next day they show up in a hilarious hybrid of office attire and DnD clothes.
- The wizard turns a conference room of clients into frogs. The boss has to try and convince him to turn them back.
- The Fighter tries many ways to sneak his sword into the office.
- The Thief keeps on stealing things and his cubicle soon becomes an overflowing hoard.
- Boss praises the elf for her productivity, when in reality she's given up and just passes off all her work to the slavering male employees.
- Wizard gives a power point presentation, no one is sure what it means, contains glyphs and arcane script. “What does this have to do with sales?”
- Thief is late for work, video games.
- Fighter seems to attract random encounters, but usually when no one is looking. A conversation with a coworker is ended with said coworker stomping off shouting “No such things as goblins!” They come in through the window a second later.